Extroverting in an Introvert's World
We live in a world where we have been constantly moving towards isolation. We use EZpass instead of saying hello at the toll line. We order off Amazon instead of running into a store to pick something up. We leverage the self-check out at the grocery store instead of a line with a cashier. Yet, during this unique crisis (COVID-19), more and more people have been struggling with their lack of interaction with other human beings.
When it is self-selected, isolation and lack of connection are great. When it is required and forced upon us, isolation can start to feel lonely… especially if you have an extraverted preference.
EXTROVERSION IS ABOUT EXTERNAL STIMULATION.
The most important thing for those going crazy without human contact is to remember that extroversion is not just about human interaction. Swiss psychoanalyst Carl Jung said, “extraverts engage with external stimuli.” Yes, you may be used to engaging with external stimuli in a specific way (hear people), but that doesn’t mean it is the only way to get fill your extraversion bucket.
Before I started my own business, I would use a team member to bounce ideas off of. I cannot tell you how many times I would say, “Sherry, can I think something through with you?” When I started my own business I was all of a sudden without a desk mate! I would sit with a blank screen in front of me and try to figure out how to process all the information I had spinning around up there. The truth was, I was used to processing it externally. But, I was able to figure out that I could still process externally… I just had to shift the way I was used to doing it. I purchased a white board from WriteyBoard and started using it to think through ideas.
There are different ways you can fill your extraverted bucket - you just have to be creative!
EXTROVERSION IS A PREFERENCE.
The other important thing to remind the self-proclaimed extroverts - extroversion is a preference. Just like having a dominate and a non-dominate hand, you have a dominate preference on the extraversion/introversion spectrum. You prefer extroversion, you default to extroversion. However, you still have access to the introversion and you can use it! This is your opportunity to practice the introverted stuff you always put off: reading, focusing on one thing at a time, slowing down, reflecting.
Yet, with all that said, I know those with an extraverted preference are still saying, "HELP ME! There is still a strong desire for filling that extraverted bucket.” So, below you will find a list of ideas to help those of you who are craving those extraverted moments:
-Have a morning cup of coffee with friends (via zoom). Invite a friend for a 7:30am cup of digital coffee - PJs included!
-Indulge in happy hour with a next door neighbor- each on your own porch! Maybe you have to move your chairs to the yard and maybe you have to talk a little louder… but what a perfect time to meet your neighbors!
-Keep background noise on while you work. Are you the type of person who is super productive in a coffee shop? There is a reason why! You feed off the energy around you! Putting on coffitivity (yes - there is a site that has recorded coffee shop sounds!) and getting to work supports your focus.
-Grab a pad of paper or turn on a voice recorder and start a brain dump. Literally get everything in your head down on paper or recorded. Those of us with an extraverted preference tend to get it all out to other people through our day (at the coffee bar, in line at Target, before the meeting starts). You have to adjust to your method, but a brain dump is a great start. Never done one before? Lifehack walks you through it!
-Do some jumping jacks. That’s right. Get up and move, even if it is in the same spot. All that energy that is boiling up and needs to come out somewhere? Put it to good use - a few jumping jacks, a few push ups… filling your extraverted bucket AND getting fit at the same time!
-Try a virtual class! So many are being offered (we are rolling out some new ones the first week of April).
-Read a book to kids. #SaveWithStories is giving people an opportunity to read kids stories for children home from school. You might not be famous, but the kids don't know that!
-Brainstorm with a coworker. Call a coworker (or even someone you don’t work with) and ask for some time to think through an idea. Just because you are home right now doesn’t mean you can’t engage with people! Other people are craving connection - maybe you just have to take the first step!
Social distancing is misleading. It’s about distancing ourselves physically… not socially.
