How to Handle Burnout
It is about this time of year that we start to feel a bit burned out. The end of the year is approaching, the sugar temptations are high (and available), and we are ready for a break.
We all know burnout. Every single one of us has been there before. You lose a level of energy about whatever you are doing. It starts to feel like a chore. It doesn't necessarily mean we stop trying, although maybe, for some of us it does. For others of us, we work harder. But regardless, when we are burned out, we typically neglect our needs, blame others, withdrawal from people, are quick to snap, and are oh-so-tired. Not to mention the fact that when we feel this way our productivity drops ridiculously low... which is funny considering the reason we typically get burned out is because we are working too hard.
Essentially, burn out is a weakened state that results from ongoing, chronic stress on our bodies. This may be physical stress - or it may be mental stress. Either way, our limbic system senses stress and goes into overdrive. That means our fight, flight, or freeze response is activated. The challenge is since we start experiencing this activation of our limbic system, our body starts sensing everything as a threat... so our adrenaline is constantly running... which throws us into a state of burnout.
So what happens when we get burned out? There are some serious health concerns with allowing burnout to continue. Some of us (myself included) have ended up in the hospital after months of burning myself out and not caring for my body. It has an impact on our relationships, our short and long term health, our productivity, and our emotional state.
I am going to assume this is something all of us can relate to.
So we all know what burnout looks like. And what it feels like. But the most important to know is what to do when we recognize we are in a state of burnout.
For me, I typically don't feel like doing any of the things I know I should be. I want to eat comfort food. I want to spend time zoning out on the couch watching TV or staring at my phone. I certainly don't want to exercise. And for some reason, even thought I am exhausted, I don't feel like getting enough sleep. So the first thing I think we should do when we sense burn out is to indulge. Those cravings don't go away - they linger and the more we try to suffocate them the more aware we are of them. So do it - give yourself permission to eat that huge bowl of pasta with a side (or a loaf) of bread. Have the three donuts. Give yourself that bowl of ice cream at 10am.
And then shut it down.
So first, let's talk about the things we know we need to do when we are burned out, but typically don't do.
EAT HEALTHY FOOD.
What I want you to do is to make a menu for the week. Identify what you are going to eat. Even if you are going to pick food up because you don't have enough time to cook, identify what you are going to pick up and from where. You want to make the decision in advance because once you are in the moment the healthier decision gets harder to make and that fried-whatever seems tempting and easy. But once you have a plan... you have a weapon to fight for you.
We know when we eat healthier, fresh, whole foods our body feels better which helps our mind feel better, which makes us feel better.
GET ACTUAL SLEEP.
The next thing - set a night alarm. For whatever time you want to start getting ready for bed. For me, that is 9:15 at the latest. I am not saying an alarm gets you to bed earlier, I am saying it is a trigger that helps you remember the choice you want to make. Also, do yourself a favor and put your phone outside of your room for the night.
Just like healthy food, if we get solid sleep we start to recharge ourselves.
MOVE YOUR BODY.
And the last super basic, but for some reason we don't do it, thing - go for a walk. Stretch for 5 minutes. Do 20 jumping jacks. MOVE. Do something that helps your body feel active. So many of us assume we have to have the perfect 60 minute workout. We think we have to put on the perfect clothes, and have our water-bottle filled, and all that stuff. We think if we are not waking up at 5am we missed our opportunity. Nope. You are on a zoom call and the meeting is just getting started? Turn off your camera and do 5 pushups. In your work clothes. You will be fine, I promise.
Eat good food, get solid, and enough sleep, and move your body.
Those are the things we know, but don't do. Below are the things we don't think about when it comes to burnout:
ACKNOWLEDGE IT.
Don't shame yourself. Say, "I AM BURNED OUT." That's ok and it's a real feeling. The second we tell ourselves we shouldn't feel burned out is the second we shame ourselves. Feeling burned out isn't a problem. The problem comes when we don't acknowledge it and therefore don't do anything about it.
Next, get to the root of the burnout. Have you taken on too much? Maybe at home? Maybe at work? Have you convinced yourself you can do it all... or that you should do it all?
TAKE ACTION.
Once you understand where the burnout is coming from, you have to take action to mitigate it. That may mean speaking to your spouse and talking through roles and expectations. It may mean approaching your supervisor and getting clarity on priorities. We, as people, are bad at asking for help. We see it as a sign of weakness. However, I so often guide people through these conversations only to find out their spouse, supervisor, or team weren't aware of the struggle, there was a miscommunication about priorities and expectations, or there can be a relatively easy solution to your concern.
SET REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS.
You also have to take a serious look at what you are asking of yourself and others. It is easy to tell yourself you still have to get it all done. However, that leads to you finishing every day feeling as if you have failed. That doesn't set you up for success. Set realistic expectations for yourself. Take 5 minutes to put a plan together the night before - not a plan with everything you needed to do over the last year that you haven't and everything you need to do in the next year. Make it realistic. (Our Kadima Planner can help you with this!)
SET OTHERS UP FOR SUCCESS.
You also have to set everyone else up for success. When we are burned out we tend to think everyone will just know what we are thinking and needing. You have to clearly communicate your expectations and make sure they understand what you need from them. Otherwise, you are frustrated that you are not getting what you want... when no one actually knows what that is.
Burnout is real. Instead of suffering through it - use the above to set yourself up for success and do something about it.
